As promised here are answers to the 3 recent queries. Do you have questions about Los Big Names? Send them here and remember LOS BIG NAMES CLOSES THIS SUNDAY!!! Spread the word- Marga

Pete Asks:
What’s Sharon Stone _really_ like?

Dear Pete,
Sharon Stone is really blonde, very appealing and stylish. She did give me one idiotic piece of advice documented in Los Big Names, but she meant well and was pretty cool otherwise. She had an entourage with her often, hairstylist, nutritionist, fitness trainer who nobody liked, and a dyke bodyguard, who was friends with my ex’s ex back in the day. Sharon made a point of shaking my hand the first day on the set and saying “Hello Marga I’m so glad to be working with you.” I was completely aroused. She always showed up at 6 am in a fabulous designer outfit and told me she wanted to make the teamsters happy.
I still feel responsible for her meeting Phil Bronstein at Glide Church- Because I was the one who suggested she check out Glide for Easter because it was the real San Francisco-
So if it hadn’t been for me Phil might not have gone to the zoo the day with Sharon and gotten his toes eaten by the Komodo dragon.
One last good thing about Sharon Stone. At the premiere of our flop- in LA the audience broke out in applause as all the names of the stars appeared in the title. I realized that my name was next- and there might be silence because I was so very unknown– But as soon as Marga Gomez flashed across the screen- I heard one row behind me cheer and lead the rest of the audience to applause. It was Sharon and her row saving my ass. Sharon is a class act no matter how many Basic Instincts sequels she cranks out.

ROBIN ASKS,
Do you have a before-you-go-on-stage ritual? If so, do you use it for both theater and stand-up? Also, will you tour LOS BIG NAMES? Chicago is a nice place .

Hi Robin
Before any performance I try to eat healthy, go to the gym or get some cardio in. And the minimum amount of stretching- Stretching bores me. For Los Big Names- I try to say all the words in the script- not act- just say them and think about what is happening in each section- I do this while I walk my dog or take the subway. So I am seen muttering a lot during the day-
It’s basic memorization, tedious like practicing scales- so I know the lines backwards and forwards. But I always try to aproach the show in new ways onstage– Lines are the only thing that is fixed. And I do about ten minutes of vocal warmups so that I don’t strain my voice for the 90 minutes. I drink two cups of throat coat tea before I step on stage. Then there are little superstitous rituals like many performers and athletes do which I can’t divulge. But usually- we always like to do certain things exactly the same before we go on. And I have pictures in my dressing room of my loved ones- And lots of Latin music from the period on my ipod with littler speakers. My girlfriend gave me a book with dogs in strange outfits and I’ll look at that sometimes before I go on- Because laughing is always helpful.
And yes I hope to tour Los Big Names- Chicago would be a great city for it I agree.

Becky Asks
How would you describe your creative process? How do you start and expand new ideas for a performance?

Hi Becky,

I guess what makes it creative makes it hard to describe. For Los Big names, I really had to decide what I wanted to say and why I had to say it. Once I figure that out the rest is a process of writing and rewriting, keeping a notebook and pen to record any breakthroughs, and for the last three years performing in workshops and discovering meaning that I hadn’t been aware of. Even now new ideas take shape. Although it’s based on my family the characters are independent of me now. I’ve heard novelists say this-

I also like to see other art that might trigger some of my writing. I went to the see the Diane Arbus exhibit last year and that influenced me a bit when I worked on Los Big names. Finally I must mention the advantage of working with my Director David Schweizer who keeps me on point as I write and sends me back to the drawing board until it’s fully realized.

Hi Everybody- Los Big Names closes in 7 days and I wanted to use this week to answer any questions about the show. How the script evolved, the performing, what was Sharon Stone really like, the costumes, what I have for lunch, anything at all that is fit for a family blog like this one. Many of you have posted comments to my entrys before but this time I will reply to every single one within 24 hours until May 14th our closing- so FIRE AWAY! Post your questions and I’ll post the answers.

And remember to encourage or force all your friends to get their butts to the 47th street theater now!!! I believe there are still discounts available- go to broadwayoffers.com and submit the code LBNA646 to save $10 bucks on Orchestra seats.

Hello. I have returned to my special place the Los Big Names blog after two weeks away. You may have imagined me being occupied playing quarters with Julia Roberts, Oprah and David Blaine at Joe Allen’s. But I’ve been chilling, doing the 8 shows a week, receiving two award nominations for OUTSTANDING SOLO PERFORMANCE from Drama Desk and Outer Critics Circle Award. There haved been more promotional events, a special El Diario Newspaper night with Latino VIPS and a special presentation for me from the best Latino paper in el mundo I was also interviewed by migente.com which should appear on their site soon. I also acquired an addiction to myspace.com.

But the most dramatic event was a 3 day attack of Vertigo that sent me to the emergency room in an ambulance for my first hospital overnight stay . But it happened on Tues. my one day off, so I was back on stage Wed night, medicated, holding on to the few pieces of scenery for balance whenever I felt like keeling over. And it realy was one of my best shows ever.

Vertigo has always reminded me of Kim Novack (who is referenced in Los Big Names) It always sounded a little glamorous but no, no it’s more than a swoon. It’s hellish but I think it’s given me the beginning of a six pack from alll the heaves. Yes this blog has TMI.

Imagine Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg, the boulevard of the tragically hip. Now imagine me being carried by paramadics down the street to the far away ambulance in some sort of beach chair contraption. It was very AARP meets MTV. Thank God that my beloved friends Earl Dax and Anastasia had rushed to my apt beforehand and got me out of my pajamas and into something more sporty. I wish they had put a trucker hat on me that would have been cute. I’m writing this between Sunday shows in this amazing cement plaza near the theater with free wireless. Free wireless and the Star Spangled Banner in Spanish would make life complete. Now I must head back to the theater for the 7 pm show and only slightly unbalanced. After tonight we go into THE FINAL WEEK OF LOS BIG NAMES.

Party Alert– Tomorrow MONDAY NIGHT MARCH 8- at 8 pm- Come to LOS BIG NAMES for Earl Dax’s DOWNTOWN AMBUSH– Get discount Orchestra seats for $20 a huge savings AND join me and Earl at a special after show party at a nearby tavern- complete with a Cuban septugenariun Drag Magician BRANDELL who works with Live Doves- All for the low low price of $20
contact earl@directfromnyc.com to get your ticket

There were four white guys in their 70’s outside the theater when I arrived. Sometimes when I come to work I think I see fans outside my theater but they turn out to be guests of the Econo-Lodge next door, stretching and getting some air after being in their cramped rooms. But these 4 guys swooped in with 3×5 index cards and I knew that I was about to have a celebrity experience, sort of. Not like Julia Roberts gets.
The first guy asks me to sign a blank index card and “try to write legibly.” He seemed annoyed with what I wrote.The next guy asked “write ‘To Tony’ make it neat.” And Joe asked the same thing- But my handwriting was not acceptable and they pulled out fresh cards. I don’t think they even said ‘please Miss Gomez’- It was ” Now Marga-” I wondered what they wanted these autographs for– but I just asked them if they were going to see the show.The leader said “Yeah sure, now Marga try to form every letter” I told him that’s not how I write my name. He insisted “Just concentrate!”
They were cutting into my blowdrying time but I concentrated on my penmanship for Joe. Almost perfect but a little of my Z skidded off the edge. They shook their heads and pulled out another card. The leader said “you don’t have that many letters. Try to get them all in.” My name felt long and insurmountable and then there was ‘To Joe’. My hand started to shake- Then they started spelling “J-O-E now M-A-R-G-A”
It was 4 autographs and I was wiped out. I’m changing my name to X.

Last night my co-producer and founder of the Puerto Rican travelling theater Miriam Colon arranged for a Latino VIP audience with a Q&A and reception. The theater was packed and there were some folks there who had met my parents. There were several media Latinos including Fernando Campos, a distinguished journalist who had interviewed my dad in the past for ‘Canales’ magazine.

It was so cool to sit on the LBN set with Miriam and field interesting questions. Many of them concerned the artistic process. After spending all the time alone writing, thinking, and performing, it’s a treat to be asked how I did it. And I’ll tell you everything until they break out the wine and cheese.

Happy thoughts on the subway home until this normal looking fellow sits next to me and asks. “Do you smell urine” I said I had allergies and couldn’t smell much. He said he smelled urine anywhere. I said maybe he should get some drycleaning. Then he started warning me about fleas. He said he’s been thinking about fleas and how you could get them and what kind of hell they can cause. I asked him if he was a scientist he said he “No! But I read.” I finally reached my stop I told him to take it easy and sprang out of the train like a Spanish Flea.

Finally I’d like to thank the sweet lady in the audience with the flowers. Thank you for giving me a couple of your flowers after I mistakenly thought the whole bunch was for me.

Photo by Tristan- Me with an unsuspecting tourist in front of the theater.

Compliments are so like mood elevating addictive pills. Thank God I’m my own worst critic so I can stay balanced.
I don’t read reviews but when they are good I find out inadvertantly. The Times and Time Out magazine are good reviews, I heard. Last night I could not resist clicking on a new Google Alert that took me to- The New Yorker.The writing was so highbrow I’m not sure if it was a good or bad review. He said some good stuff but then compared me to an “overcaffeinated animatron.” If he had just called me a caffeinated animatron then I’d be bragging. Overcaffeinated might be a dis especially at the New Yorker where they probably drink decaf. If he only knew that I used to be Peet’s coffee customer of the week. Anyway I like animatrons, their clean plastic scent, and how their faces pucker when they talk.

Before I forget - Don’t leave chocolate on your laptop it’s not a pillow. I just learned that the hard way.

Ladies and gents thanks for sharing the journey to my NY debut in these blog entries. Those of you who have added comments have proved that these late nights I’ve spent in my underwear typing away eating overpriced swiss chocolate are for a reason. They are so you can sit in your underwear and read My Big Blog.

I have also received fan mail and in person testimonials. Here are a few.

“Not once did I think of potty training during your whole show.”
New mom and Rock Goddess Alyson of Betty

“BET never makes me laugh but you make me laugh.”
Student at Harvey Milk High School

“I was able to sit and watch the entire show and now I don’t have ADD anymore”
Palabra Sadasung

Excerpts from actual fan mail

Dear Ms. Gomez

Please to stop making fun of Miss Kathleen Turner…my favorite actress in the world. Also Mister Barry Levinson, director of my second most favorite movie ever made the one with Ryan O’neal as a revolutionary soldier…Other than those egreegous bits your show is the funniest best show I have seen in a long time…. BRAVO (which your show should be on)

Steve (last name witheld for his own good)

Hi Marga,
You have renewed my faith in the power of narrative. Harry Potter did the same thing…I just wanted to thank you and draw this picture of Sharon Stone’s* vagina. What an inspiring evening.

Dan Fishkin

(*Ms. Stone’s vagina could not be scanned at this time- marga)

Photo: Outside the 47th St. Theater opening night. Left to right, Spencer Spanger fashion designer, curator and promoter Earl Dax, me caught by surprise, fashion designer Stephanie Sidjakov and Miriam Colon producer and legendary actress.

Sunday April 9th will go down in History as the best night of my life. The show was magic. I only got nervous once when I had to mime the B.J.- or rock the casbah.. The years of refinement on the script- the healthy regimen I’ve been on, the touch of sleep deprivation and the dedicated team of theater professionals in the tech booth and back stage who had my back, and the spirit of my parents guiding us made it pop. We couldn’t lose. The show got a standing ovation and really I share that with my team.

The reviews including the NY TIMES have been good- I will read them in June but I’m sure they will be posted here at losbignames.com [update: they’re in the Press Room]
My new flame was in From San Francisco. My sister brought my niece and nephew who loved it and know more about Aunt Marga than they should. If I may brag- I have a good-looking family (and flame) and everybody wanted to meet them.
Photo: Margarita’s two daughters Marga and Denise

Our party, arranged by our hottie producer Eva Price was downstairs at the Iguana Lounge. They had a rightous salsa DJ and dancing happened. My crew Scott, Joanna, Tony and Hunter were supplied ample drink tickets I hope- They deserve all the RUM in the world for their hard work.

I have heard from several people that it was everything an opening night party should be. There was a sexy vibe and celebrities- Attending the show opening night- Gloria Steinem, Mr. Murray Hill, Kate Clinton, Urvashi Vaid, Recording Artist Capitol B formerly known as Bitch, Daniella Sea, Rose Troche from the L Word, Carmelita Tropicana, Betty- the band, Mike Albo,Taylor Negron from Fast Times at Ridgemont High, award winning Director Rick McKay (”Broadway, The Golden Age”) but the most jaw dropping celebrity had to be Randy from the Village People. My niece and nephew got a real kick out him.
Photo: Me, Randy and Stephanie Sidjakov.

And just like in the old movies- the New York Times review came out on line during the party and Jonathan Reinis our real deal showman producer was on it. He promptly announced it to our tipsy revelers and much innapropriate hugging ensued.

All for now, time to do another show.

This the first full week of shows. That means - eight shows and 4 of those are on Saturday and Sunday and no more social life. My neck’s a little stiff- and my throat is scratchy. But the audience will never know. There’s a microphone concealed in my head so I can talk like an FM DJ if I want and they can hear me in the balcony. What would Ethel Mermen think about that?

Opening night is tomorrow Sunday at 7. Such an unglamouros time and day. But we’ll have fun. The audience is going to be peppered with big cheeses, best friends, my special someone, a couple exes and my sister who’s bringing the only two people who could make me nervous, my niece and nephew. I’m kind of a deadbeat aunt. But I love them. So I hope they love the show and they don’t think I’m too weird. For me Los Big Names is pretty tame family material with a few detours. I can’t even say what I do here because I’m worried that my nephew and niece are going to read my blog- Okay, I mime something with initials B.J. and it’s just for a few seconds and all in fun.
But I’ve seen teenagers in the audience this week and nobody freaked out and my niece and nephew are cool and amazing and smart and I hope they read this part.

Moving on- I take the subway to do my shows and I’ve never loved the r,n,and w lines more. Even when my show is a hit I will still take the subway to work. That’s part of being in NY theater. I used to enjoy spotting understudies on the subway around 7:30 when the star showed up and they were released. They looked like dolls with their hair done, and so much make up and promise in their expressive actress eyes.

Last night I was starving after the show and I walked to the subway eating my sandwich- trying to squeeze through the mobs of people leaving the ODD Couple, and the crowd blocking the street waiting for autographs from Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick.
There was no room on the sidewalk so I had walk in the narrow space between their two sleek limos and oncoming taxis. I thought okay I’m the girl on the other side of the tracks. But I wouldn’t trade shows with them.

Seventh preview tonight. Audience increased and I finally saw people sitting in those cute single balcony seats that are like right over my head. I probably did a stupid thing before the show. There was an Associated Press photographer assigned to take my picture and I was running late so I let her shoot me in the dressing room fresh from the shower with a towel wrapped around me applying makeup with my worn out nubs of eyeliner. I’m going to look like a geek across the nation-
But what a great show tonight. I got half a standing ovation from the middle of the room to the back. I was trying to get the front rows to notice the people behind them but they continued to applaud, facing forward, planted in their seats.
I feel a bit like I’m on a hallucugen(spellcheck?) for 90 minutes with this show- tonight was 98 minutes with laughs.

With a big hot audience like tonight I get these stretches of laughter where I have to wait for them to wane. I take full advantage of these moments to relax and hang there between lines, like I’m the audience. A happy audience makes everything else okay.
Half the Los Big Names crew have finished their jobs and left. Boo hoo. But I’ll be kicking around till Mid May.

This has been unreal. I was raised in New York a block away from Broadway. But it was Broadway at 169th Street. Now I’m starring in a show I wrote about those days that opens next Sunday at The 47th street theater on 8th avenue which is- just one block from Broadway! And that’s close enough.

Mark, our sound designer and Heather, our production consultant, are here from San Francisco, for a short time to help install the show — Well the three of us love each other (platonically) and have been through stuff for two years. Here’s a picture we took outside of rehersal with Mark’s phone-

Today was the first time we got into the theater and began rehersing the show with all the ballyhoo- It was 12 hours of dream team work spearheded by the genius director David Schweizer and our “Gringo’ light /set Designer Alex Nichols.We finally figured everything out in the new space and I wrote the new ending I was supposed to write since um- December- And David said- “well yes I approve of where you’re going with that”. Hearing that from David Schweizer- is better than sex with Angelena Jolie. I’d like to have both of course.

Step outside our theater turn your head right and see Broadway show marquees, a hundred steps away from Matthew Brodrick and Nathan Lane playing live 8 shows a week just like me and across from them Cynthia Nixon who really should be my friend.

I love being a downtown artist but I’m getting a taste for the tourist trade up here. All these millions of innocent tourists with nothing to do and all the flashing lights hypnotizing them. As I run out of rehersal to get a balance bar and some poland spring I see them. I’m a hungry performer licking my chops ready to raid Spamalot’s hen house.

I saw the 2 big producers today. Miriam and Jonathan. Miriam Colon the founder of the Puerto Rican theater which owns the 47th street theater was stuffing envelopes with my flyer and sending them out to everyone in the universe she said. I am a little embarrased because I kept kissing her and we hardly know each other really. But I couldn’t stop hugging and kissing her on the cheeks. Jonny Reinis- I mean Jonathan, the man who shares responsibility for getting me to write this story, has been in town since Tuesday and today he did carpentry with his own hands in my dressing room.

My dressing room is great. It’s very clean. I met the guy who cleaned it, Jesus. He’s the building manager. And he plans to fatten me with home cooking like my favorite arroz con gandules. But at dinner break I went to to my overpriced gym. I have a two month membership. Very snooty people at this branch.. And another unfortunate locker room experience- I was heading up the stairs after a shower swinging my arms too much and I kind of punched a naked woman in her mound. Apologies just aren’t enough sometimes.

It’s been ages since I blogged– I can’t do a really cute entry tonight just the bullet points for any of you who wonder what life is like a week before opening a show Off- Broadway. I have spent 7 days promoting and doing interviews for:

AP service - I turned the writer on to the green tea bowl at my favorite artsy cafe)

El Diario - The newspaper that my parents appeared in when I was a kid. How amazing to be in it now and to have the writer ask me about my love life. I said yes I’m single but– to check back in a few days.

Go NYC Magazine- a follow up interview to my cover shot last month as the runaway lesbian bride.

A Podcast? I went to somebody’s tribeca loft to do a podcast- The experience was a little weird, a combination of Joe Franklin and Wayne’s World.But the guys says he gets 2,000 hits.

I performed the show last wednesday in abridged form for my professor friend’s Latino Studies class at NYU- It was a blast. The students got into the family stuff and are turning out for the previews to see Los Big Names with all the razzle dazzle next week on 47th street.

Tomorrow I’m performing for student’s at Harvey Milk High School, which our producer Eva Price hooked up for me- This is meaningful because I grew up gay in NYC and would like to be there for future Margas or Markos.

I also fit in a couple of actual rehersals in a studio in Theater Row with the help of my awesome stage manager Scott Peg. Since I need eyes and ears at all time we were able to lure an illustrious little crew of theater proffessionals to watch a run through and share feedback. This group included Moe Angeles from the Lesbian Brothers hit show at New York Theater Workshop a few months ago. Moe is a blogger as well check her out at www.5lesbianbros.blogspot.com. I haven’t spent enough time with Moe over the years but I did sleep in her loft bed when she was not around. I’ll add a link to her when she sends it to me.
I went to my pal Murray Hill’s show at Mo Pitkin’s (lot’s of MOs up in heah!) and he invited me up on stage for an impromptu celebrity interview bit that included a free budweiser. I’m not drinking for Lent so I sold it to a minor on the street later. KIDDING! Murray’s the greatest. Check out his show Saturday nights at Mo’s but reserve early because it’s sells out fast.

Geez there’s so much more to tell- Oh I got kind of verbally gay bashed on the L train on Sunday- See, that doesn’t happen to Christina Applegate when she does a show. And I joined a fancy gym because doing 8 shows a week and being out of therapy for a year, I need to blow off steam somewhere. I met a naked playwright while I was drying my hair today.

I’m in great mood because of other people. Especially a special someone who spent time with me this weekend and helped me get over myself. Palabra!

That’s it. I promised myself I would start going to bed before 2am. I owe it to the ticket buyers to get some rest.